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Christmas diet song

Rating: 1 votes, 5.00 average.
Okay for all those goodies we love to eat and them regret later..this is a good laugh...

'Twas the night before Christmas and all round my hips were Fannie May candies that sneaked past my lips. Fudge brownies were stored in the freezer with care in hopes that my thighs would forget they were there.

While Mama in her girdle and I in chin straps had just settled down to sugar-borne naps. When out in the pantry there arose such a clatter I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the kitchen I flew like a flash tore open the icebox then threw up the sash. The marshmallow look of the new-fallen snow sent thoughts of a binge to my body below.

When what to my wandering eyes should appear: a marzipan Santa with eight chocolate reindeer! That huge chunk of candy so luscious and slick I knew in a second that I'd wind up sick.

The sweet-coated Santa, those sugared reindeer I closed my eyes tightly but still I could hear; On Pritzker, on Stillman, on weak one, on TOPS a Weight Watcher dropout from sugar detox.

From the top of the scales to the top of the hall now dash away pounds now dash away all. Dressed up in Lane Bryant from my head to nightdress my clothes were all bulging from too much excess.

My droll little mouth and my round little belly they shook when I laughed like a bowl full of jelly. I spoke not a word but went straight to my work ate all of the candy then turned with a jerk.

And laying a finger beside my heartburn I gave a quick nod toward the bedroom I turned. I eased into bed, to the heavens I cry if temptation's removed I'll get thin by and by.

And I mumbled again as I turned for the night in the morning I'll starve . . . 'til I take that first bite

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  1. JoAnn's Avatar
    Lynn, You are too Funny. Always finding something different. I've never seen this one before.
  2. Janice Terrell's Avatar
    Thanks for the post. Enjoyed it.
  3. faxonfive's Avatar
    Thanks Yall!!! Cute wasnt it??
  4. DohDohBird's Avatar
    LOL!!! Ain't it the truth, too! Thanks for sharing!
  5. sriley's Avatar
    Thats great!!! Just baked cookies for 2 days and the keep calling me. Lol