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Inclined Happiness: What's on Your To-Don't List?

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Yeah, you read that right, your "To Don't" list... the list of things in your life that you swear to yourself that you'll never ever do again. Things that steal your joy, rob of you of any chances of happiness that you have in your present life... THOSE things.

I'm not talking about whining about household chores, doing other peoples laundry or having to go to work each day because lets face it, We ALL have to do those mundane things, they're apart of our lives.

My top ~To Don'ts~ are . . .

  • Don't Be Lazy- Don't wait around waiting for the world to give you a handout, waiting for others to solve your problems, don't spend your time daydreaming. If your ship hasn't come in, SWIM out to It! Plain and simple. Replace lingering laziness with a fierce determination.

  • Don't Talk Down to Yourself- this is actually one of my biggest challenges... if you ask anyone that truly knows me (albeit I can count on 1 hand the people that actually do), those folks will tell you that I am my own most unrelenting critic. As I work, if I catch myself making a mistake, I audibly berate myself. I'm not the only one, people talk to themselves (usually silently!) within their own minds, but it's important that we're consciously aware of what we're conveying to ourselves and how it affects us overall. If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend?

  • Don't Say, "I don't have a Choice" - There is always a choice, there are only 2 things you have to do in this life, you have to Live and you have to die. If you say you "have to do" anything else, you're full of crap. It's a choice. Every single thing in your life that you encounter is a choice. If you're dragging yourself to a crappy job every single day of your life that you hate just to (barely) pay the bills, change your perspective. You're choosing to support yourself and your family by earning a living. If you really hate what you're doing, choose differently.

  • Don't Try to Control the Uncontrollable- if your sole goal in life is to set yourself up with a lifetime of frustration and misery then spend your life attempting to control everything that happens within it. Try to control that teenager that thinks they have life by the balls and they know exactly who they are & where they're going & how to attain all that they want... Go Ahead... "Control Them" and see where it gets you...

    Quite frankly, it is impossible to control the situations in your life. The only true control you have is how you React to those situations.

  • Don't try to Relive the Past or What Could have Been- It's easy to look back and lament about could have been, what you could have achieved if only. . . , the only true 'To Do' is to Live in the present because you aren't guaranteed a tomorrow. The past is just that, the past. It's already gone and the only thing it's good for is wallowing in. The future doesn't exist. If you're only living for what might happen down the road, you're wasting the moment. . . If you're at work and your fantasizing about going on some big elaborate vacation- you're missing out on things that are happening around you at that very moment. Always Live for NOW, it's the only moment that you can count on.

  • Don't try to be someone you're not- It's asinine to try to Be like someone else. Why? What makes them any better than you in your minds eye? Do you think that if you somehow become more like that person you'll be more popular, more loved, more essential in the lives of those around you? This part is going to sting a little.. there will Always be someone smarter, someone prettier, someone more athletic, someone younger or with a seemingly more advantageous life than yours... but if you just take the time to be yourself, the RIGHT people will love you. Seriously, do you want some stuffed shirt who only "likes" you because of some false pretense of who you are?? I don't and I genuinely feel that if someone doesn't like me for who I am, that's their problem. What someone else thinks of you is NONE of YOUR business, it has nothing to do with you at all.

Those are a few of the items on my ~To Don'ts ~ List... do you have a To Don'ts list?

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  1. sandy63's Avatar
    I am so understanding the "Don't" be someone you are not. Someone told me at work once (nursing) that I smiled to much and was too cheerful with the patients to the point that it made her sick and I told her that her not liking me was her problem not mine and she could deal with it herself. We were all put on this earth to serve God and mankind. I have helped many during my life and hope to help more before I go "Home." Sometimes helping is just a smile or kind word. If the world had more "givers" and fewer "takers" this world would be in great shape.
  2. KatzTazTrophy's Avatar
    on my don't list is "never say never"--because you just never know what you may and may not do...51 years here and its taught me a lot!