- July 28, 2007 at 11:31 pm #252902
Keep in mind a few things-
1. The bride & groom may have decided on a hard cut off line of 18, and
not known your older child was 18 yet.
2. In allowing 1 family to bring “children” under the age of 18 in,
they would have had other people wanting the same.
3. The cost of food is one of the biggest expenses for a wedding, so
chances are, by eliminating “children”, it cut the expense to a more
Now, honestly, I don’t consider people in the mid to late teens as
children. They are young adults. But, unless they are close to the
bride and groom, most often, young adults also don’t want to spend
their weekend cooped up at a wedding reception where they don’t have
friends to keep them entertained.
Personally, we allowed kids at our reception, and it didn’t both us. We
had a very laid back, casual reception, and while the kids could be
bothersome at times, it wasn’t something that I felt ruined the event.
However, not everyone thinks that kids running around terrorizing a
reception is a good idea, either. Family event or not, the day isn’t
about the kids who are allowed to run free- it’s about the two people
getting married, and celebrating.
More often than not, in all the receptions I’ve ever been to or
involved as a member of the wedding party, you tend to have young kids
roaming free, running wild, while the parents socialize and don’t pay
attention to them.
At one reception I was at a few years back, I was basically handed the
baby of the Bride & Groom, and left holding her for a good hour before
I finally gave up waiting for someone to rescue me, and handed her off
to one of her grand parents. While the Bride & Groom shouldn’t have to
worry about taking care of their child during the reception, they also
should have had something planned ahead of time, so that it wouldn’t be
passed off on the guests.
At another reception I was at when I was about 18, there were kids
running around all over the place, then they fell into the cake table,
and the cake fell to the ground, completly ruined- before pictures were
I’ve seen kids running free and grabbing favors off tables like it was
a free day at the dollar store, as well as messing with the gift table.
I don’t think that it’s too much to ask that parents either leave their
children at home with a sitter for the evening, or that they at the
very least, supervise their own children while at an event like this.
Again, I didn’t mind having children at my reception. But I don’t think
that the Bride and Groom in any situation should be looked down on
simply because they want to forgo any headaches involved with having
children invited. it’s not a personal slap in the face. they don’t send
a “kid free” invite to just a few people, and allow others to bring
now, granted, if a bride & groom were to pull someone aside and
say, “hey, your kids are little terrors, don’t bring them to our
party!”, then i’d agree- it’s offensive.
most often, though, it’s simply a matter of people getting offended
over something that is not meant to be offensive, and hey, if they do
get offended over the way a party they are not hosting, not paying for,
and not involved in the planning of goes, then maybe it is better off
they don’t attend.
the bottom line at the end of the day is the bride & groom pay for the
party, provide the party, and what they want should be listened to.
— in Budget101_@yahoogroups.com, “Katrina Hartman”
> I guess I should have prefaced this with the fact that we have been
good friends with the groom’s parents for 25 plus years. I was a
bridesmaid in their wedding 22 years ago, so we’ve “known” the groom
since before he was born. The groom and our daughter attending HS
together for 2 years…we live in neighboring villages. My DH kinds
took it as a slap in the face…it ws ok for the “kids” to attend the
wedding, but not the “adult celebration”, heck…the groom just turned
20 in June, not even old enough to LEGALLY consume alcohol in our state.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.