So tired of fighting with my husband over money!!!

Budget101 Discussion List Archives Budget101 Discussion List So tired of fighting with my husband over money!!!

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      My advise is We went to his 13 week financial freedom classes.

      He did teach us to take our credit card debt and put it in order of highes to

      lowest amount we owe. Make minimum payment on all except the lowest one. The

      rest of the credit cards that you are paying minium on, take the extra you have

      been putting on them and put it towrds the lowest amount you owe. You now have

      payed off one card. Next month do the same, take the lowest amount plus the

      extra amount you have been paying on the other ones. If you can afford it, go

      to his classes you will learn allot. We’ve been married for 26 yrs and I too

      was tired of fighting over money. I didn’t ask him if he wanted to go. I just

      told him that we signed up for it and we are going. I was lucky that that

      worked. Bad habits are hard to break, and that is 70% of all of our financial

      problems. When our cell phone contracts expire they are a goner. We will use

      track phones and save

      allot of money, that works for us, but might not work for everyone. We have

      learned the difference between want and need.


      My husband got home from work today and a glance at the most recent

      bills that arrived in today’s mail, began yet another round of our

      continuing battle over bills! We’ve been married over 10 years now,

      have 2 kids of our own plus his 19 yo daughter from his first

      marriage (she lives with her mother, but we help her out with things

      on occasion.) We seem to continually get in over our heads. Just

      when we feel like we’re getting on top of things, something always

      happens to throw a wrench into our finances and we’re back in debt up

      to our eyeballs. Throughout our life together I have been the “bill

      payer”… a job I’m resenting more and more. My husband blames me

      for our financial situation… he says I am not paying the bills

      correctly. That I “should be paying things off, not spreading the

      money around a little here a little there…” My point to him is if

      you have 5 or 6 bills due at the same time and only enough to make

      the minimum payments on each, or pay off one completely and let the

      other 4 or 5 slide… how can you do that!?!? We’d end up having

      utilities shut off, no gas in the cars, no groceries, or worse credit

      that we already have!!! He doesn’t want to actually take over doing

      the bills, he just wants to tell me how to do it! We’ve never really

      worked off a budget… I’ve attempted to several times, but seeing

      all the debt written out on paper just seems to make the task of

      paying it all off that much more daunting. Plus, when I’ve actually

      listed everything in black and white, it just sets my husband off!

      He’ll read through it and start yelling, “Why is that bill still on

      here!? I thought that was paid?!? Why are we behind on that one?!?

      etc… It’s so FRUSTRATING! I want to have a meaningful

      conversation about getting our finances straightened out, but my

      husband just starts yelling at me and then I get defensive and yell

      too, and nothing gets accomplished. I’m tired of being blamed for

      everything also. It’s not like I’m buying clothes or frivolous stuff

      for myself. I’m not wasting our money. I admit I have made a few

      errors in our check book that have screwed up our finances at times

      (i.e. overdraft fees etc.) The only other financial “sin” I’m

      most guilty of is eating out for lunch too often during the work

      week… But, he does too, so it’s not like I’m the only one. The

      last few weeks I’ve really made a conscious effort to take lunch from

      home (leftovers, a sandwich, etc) and have only ate out once or twice

      in the last 3 weeks. I’ve told my husband he should do the same, but

      he continues to spend $20 to $30 a week on breakfast and/or lunch at

      the cafeteria at his work. He said he’d take lunch if I made it for

      him every day. Fat chance! I’m not his mother! If I can make my

      own lunch then he’s capapble of doing the same for himself. Am I


      Any advice will be greatly appreciated!!! Thanks for listening!

      Wendy in MI


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Budget101 Discussion List Archives Budget101 Discussion List So tired of fighting with my husband over money!!!