Scared in own room

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    • #266803

      My daughter is three and has never been afraid of the dark. She would even get up to go potty in the middle of the night by herself. Now all of a sudden she is terrified to go to sleep at night.

      For about two weeks now I’ve fought with her for an hour of hysterical crying and the past couple of nights I just haven’t had the energy to deal with it and let her fall asleep on the couch watching tv and carried her off the bed later (I know that’s horrible).

      My son who is five has always been afraid of pretty much everything so I don’t know if she’s feeding off his fears or what. But he goes to bed fine. Any ideas?

    • #403821

      Some children are just more sensitive to things. Sometimes the see or hear things that scare them but don’t verbalize it then when they go to sleep their brain dwells on it. You might try having them sleep in the same room for a little while, itmight help just knowing that someone else is in the same room.

      If you do let them sleep on the couch don’t let them watch the television-this can be a hard habit to break later. Try talking with her to see why she is afraid to go to sleep, if it is that she is scared of the dark go ahead and leave the bedroom light on for her, maybe a radio will help to distrct her thoughts. Hope some of this helps 🙂

    • #403862

      Such good ideas you have given atta76, Kim. I used to do the radio and light thing for one of mine. And then he slowly out grew the light.

      Still uses a radio to this day.

    • #403876

      Excellent wisdom Kim!!

      I used to leave the closet light on for my kids and then they had the round lights that you can tap on – I gave each one and whenever they needed that extra security of light – there it was 🙂

      I also read them books each night or we told each other stories, sometimes the stories would lead them them telling me why they were afraid of the dark.

    • #403881

      Thanks so much, she does have a light but I never thought about a radio.

    • #403889

      Let us know how it goes if it works or not. A really important thing is to praise her and make a big to do about it if she does sleep all night in her own bed. This will encourage her to keep doing it.

    • #403979

      My kids swore there were monsters in their rooms. So I made monster spray(I think you can buy this now, I think I saw it somewhere) All I did was put water in a spray bottle with a little scented oil every night we would spray anywhere they said were monsters in their room (closet, under the bed etc). It worked they could smell the monster spray and knew no monsters could go where the spray was. They slept and it fragranced their room too.

    • #404027

      Love the spray idea, never thought about doing something like that before. I also have a little one that is afraid of the dark. I do leave on the bathroom light for him, and then the radio.

      He loves the radio idea. It keeps him from thinking about things that might bother him. He sleeps very well with it.

      I try to put on soothing music, something that well relax him. My oldest has out grown this, so I know that my youngest well too. Let us know how it goes for you.

      It just takes time for them to calm down.

    • #404033

      I had forgotten but I had one that was really hard to get to sleep. He has ADHD and it took him forever to calm down enough to sleep. I put a cd player in his room and would play relaxing cds.

      He loved things that were native american with the drum beats with nature sounds etc. worked really well

    • #404072

      its right after Halloween, lots of things in stores, peers etc were scary .. Its somewhat normal that they don’t understand it was pretend

      I used Native American music to calm my kids (I had 5 kids all with adhd some with bipolar and other mental health issues) the standard beat tends to slow their heart rate down which calms them. i also used classical the same one every day for naps – because it wasn’t new those with adhd don’t hyperfocus on the next song, as they know what it will be.

      make a dream catcher – email me if you need directions hslinks @ gmail . com *(take out the spaces)

      i used a small aquarium the air stones/bubbler tended to work like white noise, the light was bright enough i could walk in to do diapers etc in the middle of the night and not get killed stepping on toys .. even if you get the cheapy charcoal filter it makes a noise too .. (you may need to put washcloth under the motor, cause of vibration noise)/ put the fish food in another room – or they will mega feed them ..

      goldfish are cheap but dirtier, the others generally will need a heater in the tank. the live breeders are neat when they are pregnant, and you put them in the minitank (so others don’t eat the babies) and have it (put them back in big tank afterwards).

      try a rocker in their room and do story time there .. in fact if you have one of those mini book lights they could be getting used to the darker room while you are reading

      make sure that there are no trees or bushes touching the house, anything within a foot can scratch the side of the building under wind or snow load. this tends to make the kids more scared.

      dark dark curtains, try lining them with old blankets (keeps it warmer too) .. i actually ended up painting the window with craft paint .. when light from cars or moon comes in, it makes weird shadows.

      if you have a tree near by it’s shadow can look really strange.

      i didn’t use the radio because they will want to use it when they are teens, and at that point they will use the headphones on high and mess their ears up.. the bubbler usually works ..

      i’m pretty sure i have monster sprays and dream pillows in my files if you want. just email me at the gmail


    • #404074

      Thanks so much, so many great ideas. This is such a wonderful, caring group!

      The past two nights have been okay. A little fussing but not the crazy crying like before. I think Halloween did have something to do with it now that I think about it.

      She was not liking to go by the Halloween displays in the stores.

    • #398513

      I too have a little one (5) that tends to have “bad dreams” every night just so she can come get in bed with me. i really like the fish tank idea. maybe she will get a new fish for christmas and mom can get a solid nights sleep.


    • #404369

      when my kids were young we used monter spray ( water and vanilla extract) we sprayed under the bed in the closets and in the air -to scare away the monters -silly but it always seemed to work -good luck Bobbi -ne

    • #409024

      Doing daycare I have learn that children are all different. And children that are really sensitive need a routine . For daycare I use a timer – for taking turns with toys and when it gets to be 15 minutes before quiet time I tell them when the timer goes off it is lay down time.

      Try telling your 3 year old when the timer goes off it will bed time. As far as the screaming that is typical -and usually when they get their way it is hard to break -I leave a small light on and let them listen to music. But they must stay on their blankets.

      You will need to be firm and make her stay in her bed. As far as your son – I have had kid that are afaid of everything from dirt,bugs , even cartoons that most kids enjoy – I simply reasure them – the cartoons I try and avoid. Sometimes with like bugs I try and show them they won’t harm you .

      Hope this helps . Bobbi -NE

    • #409026

      Thanks so much! She is doing much better now. She’ll go to bed fine but still sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night to come and find me.

      But so much better than the terrified screaming so was doing when I would just mention bedtime before.

    • #409064

      @atta76 92114 wrote:

      Thanks so much, so many great ideas. This is such a wonderful, caring group!

      The past two nights have been okay. A little fussing but not the crazy crying like before. I think Halloween did have something to do with it now that I think about it.

      She was not liking to go by the Halloween displays in the stores.

      I worked in a Halloween store. Most kids (8 and under*) HATE going near displays. It scares the bejeebus out of them.

      Its usually not the best place to take kids, especially since where I used to work, it was encouraged to scare people or freak them out.

      I actually had to quit because I couldn’t stand seeing kids cry on their way out from how frightened they got.

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Budget101 Discussion List Archives Kids / Children Scared in own room