- This topic has 17 replies, 1 voice, and was last updated May 16, 2007 at 7:54 pm by .
- May 16, 2007 at 7:54 pm #251945Guest
Honestly- he’s probably not doing anything horrible with it, but at
17 likely feels that it’s his money, and he’ll spend it if he wants.
It’s a normal thing for a teen to go through.
That aside, at some point- you have to let them flounder in order to
teach them. It sounds harsh, it goes against what we feel is right,
but how many teenagers actually do what we, as parents, say, the
first time we say it, without learning that their way might NOT be
Teens are stubborn. While we know that our own mistakes taught us
how to do things right, and we want to pass that knowledge on, it
can often lead to more stubbornness- especially in a tempetous
relationship such as you and your son already have.
Yelling at him, taking stuff away, and telling him what NOT to do
only makes them want to do it more.
While your first gut reaction is to take away money he has in his
savings, it might just trigger further anger, and widen the gap in
It might be best if you and your ex-husband try to talk out a good
way of dealing with it calmly. Losing your anger with him, yelling
at him, it isn’t making things get through to him, and only causes
Frugality aside- this is a problem with learning to relate to your
son, not teaching him how to save his money.
If he’s behind in his insurance, pull the plates from his vehicle
until he gives you the money to catch it up. If you think he might
still drive it, take the battery out.
If he pays up his debt with you, reinstate it. If he continues to
not pay it, or it gets worse, or he incures further debts, then
think about selling the car- IF you bought it. If HE bought it, it’s
his property, not yours.
— In Budget101_@yahoogroups.com, “Anggie Thompson”
> I just found out that my 17 year old took a lot of money out of
> account over a week’s time. I am so furious that I am beyond
> child has not deposited a paycheck in two months, so that money
> money he took out of his savings account is totally unaccounted
for. He owes
> me for car insurance. We had an issue two weeks ago about the use
of the car
> and we almost sold the car because of his attitude and totally
> the “car use” rules. He and I are just alike with our tempers and
I tend to
> yell and get mad at him a lot because he won’t follow the rules.
> just moved his savings money (what’s left of it) to an account
that he does
> not have access to thru his ATM. I know I can’t make him save
> give me his paycheck for me to split it to deposit into savings &
> He is just like his dad (we’re divorced, wonder why?) when it
> money. You’d think he’d learn my frugal ways, as I do not spend
> frivolously. Any tips on how to teach him how to budget?
> I am very concerned because I don’t have the money to send him all
> through college and at the rate he’s going, he won’t have any
> contribute to his education or living expenses. Am I a bad parent
if I make
> him pay for the first year of community college, then if he can do
> responsibly, I’ll pick up what I can for him to transfer to a
> Fight Breast cancer……no one should die from it
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