Help me!

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      We have 4 children. They MUST help with their higher education or there will be no higher education.

      Our 20 year old pays all his own expenses except books and tuition. He lives in a house with a roommate. He works two jobs and goes to school. He has a 3.25 GPA. He was never the world’s greatest student until college. We strongly encouraged him to figure out what he wanted to do with his life. He decided that he wants to be a firefighter, did the research and found that he would make more money and have more opportunities for advancement with a college degree. He is currently at community college with plans to transfer to a 4 year university after getting a 2 year degree.

      Our 19 year old wanted to cut hair. We paid his tuition to barber college. He pays all his other expenses, including car insurance and cell phone. If he didn’t pay car insurance regularly we would drop him from our
      policy. He knows this. We’ve never really discussed it much. If I had to drive him to school and work I would somehow.

      Some people believe in sending your child to college PERIOD. We haven’t followed that path. I paid for my college education as did my husband. Our idea is to HELP THEM but they must want to help themselves. It’s been pretty stress free actually. We talked about how this would work all through their high school years so it wasn’t a surprise to them when they became college age. The same thing will happen with their two younger siblings.

      If they would yell at me that would end the conversation and close my checkbook. However, I am more of an adult than they are so if conversations start to become a little heated I exit the conversation until a later time. I just haven’t allowed things to escalate.
      Dusty in NC

      Anggie Thompson
      wrote: I just found out that my 17 year old took a lot of money out of his savings account over a week’s time. I am so furious that I am beyond words. This child has not deposited a paycheck in two months, so that money plus the money he took out of his savings account is totally unaccounted for. He owes me for car insurance. We had an issue two weeks ago about the use of the car and we almost sold the car because of his attitude and totally disobeying the “car use” rules. He and I are just alike with our tempers and
      I tend to yell and get mad at him a lot because he won’t follow the rules. I have just moved his savings money (what’s left of it)to an account that he does not have access to thru his ATM. I know I can’t make him save money or give me his paycheck for me to split it to deposit into savings & checking. He is just like his dad (we’re divorced, wonder why?) when it comes to money. You’d think he’d learn my frugal ways, as I do not spend money frivolously. Any tips on how to teach him how to budget? I am very concerned because I don’t have the money to send him all the way through college and at the rate he’s going, he won’t have any money to contribute to his education or living expenses. Am I a bad parent if I make him pay for the first year of community college, then if he can do that responsibly, I’ll pick up what I can for him to transfer to a university?

      Anggie
      Fight Breast
      cancer……no one should die from it

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