Budget101 Discussion List Archives Women’s Issues Daughter in a abusive relationship

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      This is exactly the issue. I also speak
      from experience. She has no idea the world that’s waiting for her when
      she pulls herself out of this, with your support waiting for her at the end of
      it.

      So much good advice, I’m really glad
      to see it.

      I can’t disagree with any of it.

      Keep your negative opinions quiet,
      however, begin encouraging her to make steps to improve herself without
      comparing her to other children, cousins, your friends’ children etc.

      If she isn’t in school discuss an
      interest she might build into a career, such as nursing which is in such high
      demand she could have school entirely paid for. Or shorter programs in the
      healthcare or technical fields.

      Her confidence needs building. No amount
      of telling her she’s better than she’s allowing herself to be is
      going to change anything. She has to prove it to herself.

      Compliment her on
      anything and everything she does *by herself*
      without mentioning anyone else. No ‘see, you don’t need him for
      ____’.

      Positive reinforcement, just like when she
      was a potty-training tyke.

      Back away, but be there. I love the idea
      of inviting them to do things. How well do you know this gentleman?

      It is
      possible *he* doesn’t know
      what a positive loving relationship even looks like. Be an example, not a
      warden.

      Keeping in contact with her will enable
      you to show your support of her as well as enable you to keep an eye on her
      physically. If you feel she is TRULY in danger, do not hesitate to contact the
      police.

      Keeping you in my thoughts.

      12.0pt;color:#4D0082;font-style:italic;”>Shanna

      10.0pt;color:#4D0082;font-style:italic;”>lforbes@azkrmc.com

      From: Budget101_@yahoogroups.com
      [mailto:Budget101_@yahoogroups.com] On Behalf
      Of
      Kristin Keller

      Sent: Monday, August 13, 2007 8:12
      PM

      To: Budget101_@yahoogroups.com

      Subject: Re: Budget101.com :
      Daughter in a abusive relationship

      Hi Melissa,

      I can tell you from experience, she believes she either can’t do any
      better, or that she deserves to be treated this way.

      Prayer was the only thing that got me out. Just let her know she
      has somewhere to run to when she is ready to go. A lot of times it is a sudden
      spur of the moment thought, and if she has somewhere to go, it may be easier
      for her to go.

      Also, be prepared, have the number for your local Center Against
      Sexual and Domestic Violence. They offer free counseling and a lot of times
      those who have been abused won’t talk to family about it.

      hth,

      Kristin

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Budget101 Discussion List Archives Women’s Issues Daughter in a abusive relationship