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Thread: The Purina Diet

  1. #1
    Deal Goddess
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    Talking The Purina Diet

    The next time someone asks you a dumb question wouldn’t you like to respond like this?...

    Yesterday I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Athena, my wonder dog. I was in the checkout line and the woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I’m retired, with little to do, on impulse I told her NO, I didn’t have a dog and that I was starting the Purina Diet again.

    “I probably shouldn’t,” I continued, “because I ended up in the hospital the last time. I awoke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. However, I did lose 40 pounds on the diet, so I’m giving it another go.”

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is you load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two ever time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete and I needed to lose a few more pounds.

    I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was, by now, enthralled with my story.

    Horrified, this woman asked if I ended up in intensive care because I’d been poisoned by the dog food. I told her no, it happened because I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish setter’s ass and a car hit both of us.


    I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack because he was laughing so hard!

    Wal-Mart won’t let me shop there anymore….
    ~Enjoy!~

    FreebieQueen

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  2. The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to FreebieQueen For This Useful Post:


  3. #2
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    Just tooooo funny, cracked me up too.
    Niddi

  4. #3
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    Fell off my chair laughing again!!!

  5. #4
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    This was soooo funny !!! I loved it LOL !!!!
    Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD. Psalm 127:3
    There shall nothing cast their young, nor be barren, in thy land: the number of thy days I will fulfil.
    Exodus 23:26

  6. #5
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    I think the rates up there with the things you can do in an elevator. Definitely my two favorites. Thanks. We need more laughter in this world.

  7. #6
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    He He He....Thanks for the chuckle!

  8. #7
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    That was good I have never been asked that at Walmart

  9. #8
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    Default Re: The Purina Diet

    Loved it........very funny..............
    Tonia

    Wisdom is doing now what you will be happy with later on.

 

 

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