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  1. #1
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    Default Building one's self confidence

    Self-confidence does not come naturally to everyone. The good news is that it is possible to gain self-confidence. Here's what to do.

    Smiling. People like friendly people Ė and nothing says someone is approachable like a smile. Plus, itís been shown that smiling on the outside will improve a personís mood. The combination of feeling better and getting nods and smiles from other people is a great confidence booster.

    Maintaining good posture. Standing tall improves a personís looks and shows the person feels secure and confident. Bad posture, on the other hand, can zap a personís energy and stress their back and shoulders. For many people, just being aware of how they sit, stand, and walk can be enough to improve their posture. Other people can benefit from ďcoreĒ body exercises like yoga or Pilates. Still others might merit a trip to the chiropractor. However a person gets their posture, standing tall is a simple thing that goes a long way to showing self-confidence.

    Making eye contact. People who feel painfully shy often avoid looking at others. Unfortunately, the message they often end up giving is ďLeave me alone!Ē Meeting someoneís gaze Ė whether it is a cute stranger or a job interviewer Ė lets them know that a person is approachable and confident. People used to averting their eyes can find it difficult to look at others, but this will improve with time. Shy people can practise holding a stare for two seconds, then longer until they work up to five seconds.

    Preparing for events. Some things are stressful enough without people sabotaging themselves. But insecure people sometimes avoid preparing for things that make them feel uncomfortableÖ which only increases their anxiety and decreases their performanceÖ which makes them feel that they were right in thinking they are no good at whatever it is. The best way to stop this cycle and feel confident about giving a speech or going for an interview or dancing in public or what have you is by knowing what to expect and what to do.

    Being bold. Whether itís giving a speech or dancing in public, sometimes people have to put themselves out there and do something that doesnít come naturally or that doesnít make them feel comfortable. Most things only get easier with experience. People need to push through their fears to see that they are mostly unfounded. Itíll get a little easier each time until itís no longer necessary to fake the self confidence Öitís really there.

    Giving oneself some slack. Nobodyís perfect, but people tend to obsess about what they donít like about themselves. People who do this donít give others much of a chance to notice all the things about them that are great. When self-defeating thoughts start, people need to take a deep breath and move on. Almost everyone feels insecure sometimes, but self-confident people donít let those doubts control them.

    Knowing when to say no. People who lack self-confidence sometimes let themselves be used by others. Perhaps they are pleased that others notice their existence, or they donít want to disappoint. Whatever the reason, it is important not to let oneself be used. It lowers oneís confidence and can even put a person in a dangerous situation. People who donít give someone the time of day unless you are doing something for them are not worth the effort. Being able to say no shows a person cares about themself and can be a great boost to self-confidence.

    Taking care of oneself. People often fail to notice how their emotions and their physical well-being interact. When people donít get enough sleep, donít provide the proper fuel for their body, and donít move their bodies, it is hard for them to feel good about themselves. Taking care of oneís body will lift a personís mood, boost their energy level, and improve their looksÖ making it that much easier to feel self-confident.

    Tragedy, sadness, loneliness and despair taught me that life is really a beautiful thing; if it wasn't I wouldn't be able to recognize that anything was wrong - Lynn in Virginia


  2. #2
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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    Thanks Lynn, I had my d read this one

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    Its hard to train yourself to be confident if you're not used to it. In middle school I ended up training myself for a more confident me, it really helped my mood out. Posture thing is something I really need to train myself on though, even earlier today I notice I've been slouching a lot... its hard for me for some reason.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    I have always had a self confidence problem when I was in school. I am a red head and YES I always got picked on!! Yes it was very hard to train myself But I basically taught myself that I am better than that and smiles hid the alot.

    Tragedy, sadness, loneliness and despair taught me that life is really a beautiful thing; if it wasn't I wouldn't be able to recognize that anything was wrong - Lynn in Virginia

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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    It makes no sense to me why people always have this need to pick at each other with something as menial as having a certain color hair.

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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    Amen Lynn, I am still having problems with that one.

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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    Yep Jaime...it really gets to you....Now (I bet you know this one) the men wont stop flirting cause of the red hair!!!
    Tragedy, sadness, loneliness and despair taught me that life is really a beautiful thing; if it wasn't I wouldn't be able to recognize that anything was wrong - Lynn in Virginia

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    Default Re: Building one's self confidence

    That's so true...the comments really get annoying. It's so sad that I pay to be brunette. Of course. I am not so red headed anymore...some white is showing up LOL

 

 
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