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    Mar 2013
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    Talking What happens in Heaven, STAYS in Heaven!

    What Happens in Heaven Stays in Heaven

    All arrivals in heaven have to go through a bureaucratic
    examination to determine whether admission will be granted. One room has a
    clerk who inputs computerized records of what each applicant did on his or her
    last day of life.

    The first applicant of the day explains that his last day was not
    a good one. "I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed. She
    claimed she had just gotten out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry and I
    checked the shower and it was completely dry, too.

    I knew she was into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover. I went
    onto the balcony of our 9th floor apartment and found the SOB clinging to the
    rail by his finger tips. I was so angry that I began bashing his fingers with
    a flower pot. He let go and fell, but his fall was broken by some awnings and

    On seeing he was still alive, I found super human strength to drag
    our antique cedar chest to the balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and
    killed him. At this point the stress got to me and I suffered a massive heart
    attack and died." The clerk thanked him and sent him on to the next office.

    The second applicant said that his last day was his
    worst. "I was on the roof of an apartment building working on the AC
    equipment. I stumbled over my tools and toppled off the building. I managed to
    grab onto the balcony rail of a 9th floor apartment but some idiot came
    rushing out on the balcony and bashed my hands with a flower pot.

    I fell, but hit some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up I saw
    a huge chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way but failed and was hit and
    killed by the chest."

    The clerk couldn't help but chuckle as he directs the man to the
    next room.

    He is still giggling when his third customer of the day enters.

    He apologizes and says "I doubt that your last day was as interesting as the
    fellow in here just before you."

    "I don't know" replies the man, "picture this, I'm buck naked,
    hiding in this cedar chest....."
    Only in the United States is it permissible to sell food without the labeling of Genetically Modified Organisms. This needs to stop, we DESERVE to know what is in our food!

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