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Thread: OT- curfew

  1. #1
    Deal GURU
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    Default OT- curfew

    This is an OT subject, but I need advice on curfews. Feel free to contact me off the list. My oldest DS will be 17 on Valentine's day (oh, I feel so old!). We had a heated "discussion" this weekend about curfews. My opinion is that if he works the next day, he needs to be home by 9:30. He has to get up earlier for work than he does for school. I'm not sure what to move it to if he goes in later to work. What do ya'll do?

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    Re: OT- curfew


    If you own the house, then you make the rules. I follow the golden rule... he who makes the gold, sets the rules <grin>.
    Although I would push it to the end of the night news (10:30 here in Texas) on any night he has to work/go to school the next day or to 30 mins before his bedtime on those days if he wasn't out.
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    Re: Budget101.com : OT- curfew


    My DD is at a private collage and they have a 11:00 curfew. Someone comes inn between 11 to 11:30 pm and checks on them. If they are not in their room they pay $5.00 penalty. Saturday the curfew is 1:00 AM. She is 19 yrs old. If a collage has a curfew than so can I. We talked about the curfew when she comes home and she's not too happy. I also feel that if they have school and or work the next day they have to be in at a decent hour. Also if my kids are out late at night I can't sleep, that is just the way I am. So as a common courtesy to me they need to be inn at a decent time. I also told them that when they are on their own they will have the privilege of staying out as late as they want to. It will cost them their job if they abuse it.

    Some of you are thinking what kind of collage is this. It is SDA. We don't drink, smoke, wear jewelry etc. If you are caught breaking these rules there is a fine for each of them. Oh yes, there is no dish or cable on campas either. My kids do not have a problem since this is how we were raised.

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    Re: OT- curfew


    At 17, 9:30 seems a bit early for a non-school night. I would give
    him some lee-way, myself. My opinion would be that teens have to
    learn to be independant by BEING independant. If he has a later
    curfew, and finds that he's tired at work the next day, he'll learn
    by trial and error.

    Giving him the option to stay out later would show him you trust
    him, and would let him learn his own boundries on how to be a
    responsible person.
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    Re: Budget101.com : OT- curfew


    When our girls were home their weekday curfew, during school time, was 10 pm starting when they were about sophomores in high school. Weekends was midnight (Fri, and Sat). BUT, if they were out until midnight on Saturday night and they had any problems getting up or complaining about getting up for church on Sunday, then the next time they wanted to be out on Sat night, curfew was 10 pm. It worked too. Most of the time they were home way before curfew. They also had to let us know where and who they were with at all times.
    The only other rule was no R-rated movies and no boys in the house when we weren't here. Lots of times they were on the porch or back deck.

    They all turned out fine and no major problems. HAHA--they weren't damaged for life either.

    Deb in MO
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    Re: Budget101.com : OT- curfew


    Don't turn him lose. Let him invite a friend over for a movie and pizza, Valentine Banquet at church, etc. I am saying this because of my grandson who was not given specific curfews and now at 19 the parents are trying to get him back under control. He has just had his second DWI, hit a car in the back,left the scene of the accident,and no car insurance. He has a job mking $600/week etc. and no responsibilities. He is a good man but can not drink. Please help me pray for him. thanks for letting me vent.
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    Re: Budget101.com : OT- curfew


    My DD will graduate in May and will be 18 in June, and we will evaluate the curfew situation again then. For now, Sun.-Thur. 10PM, Friday and Saturday, Midnight (she is allowed later if there has been an out of town game she has had to cheer at). She is a straight A student, athlete, holds a part-time job...she is responsible for half of her car payment and ALL of the insurance and gas.
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    Re: OT- curfew


    Okay, my kids are young, so I am not in this boat yet. However, when I
    was in high school even into college (when I lived at home), I never
    had a curfew and I never understood the concept. Basically, my mom
    didn't give me a set time to be home, she just wanted to know exactly
    when I'd be home for the evening and where exactly I was going to be
    on any given evening. If I was watching a movie with a friend that
    went a little long, I could just call her and let her know where I was
    and when I'd be home--sometimes it was 2 am, but my parents were okay
    with that because they knew I was safe and when to expect me. That
    way, I was never in trouble. Plus, it built trust between my parents
    and me--they knew I'd always call. To this day, if I am running late
    for anything/anywhere, I always call whoever may be waiting on me.

    The kids that I knew who just had a curfew were all over the place and
    in all kinds of trouble--often times their parents didn't even know
    it.

    I plan to work it the way my mom did. I don't want to tell my
    child "have fun, be home by midnight," too much partying goes on
    between 9 and midnight, especially in smaller towns where there isn't
    much for teens to do. I don't think everything my parents did was the
    right way, but I absolutely believe they had this one right.

    Just thought I'd share a different point of view. Good luck with your
    teens!! I'm sure whatever choice you make will be the right choice fo
    r your family.
    Lori
    Suburbs of Dallas
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