How to convince someone to budget and save

Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to live by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a raining day. This person has been freeloading and etc... but, try to run everyone

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  1. #1
    Oscar
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to live

    by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a

    family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a

    raining day.

    This person has been freeloading and etc... but, try to run everyone

    financial life. He/She has not work for 15 years and stress those who

    do work on buying things or pay bills that we feel that are not that

    urgent or worry about.

    We want to toss this person out along with their kid, we agree it will

    benefit us but, that would not sit right with our family as a whole.

    How can we silence this freeloading worrier about bills and convince

    them about the benefits of a frugal living ,budgeting,and saving money?



    We are at our end with the price of gas and things this individual

    will actively seek work but, they still will not help.



    Well, Thank You for your time,help,and gratitude.



    Best Regards,

    Oscar








  2. #2
    Lou Ann Newell
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    Oscar, first and foremost think of your family first. This is only wife and children. Throw the freeloader out and let them fend for themselves. Why are you supporting them?? Are they able bodied and can work? If so they need to get a job and help with the expenses or they need to get out. They are costing you money with utilites, food, and anything else you furnished them. I know that it is hard but you are enabling them to freeload off of you. Put a stop to it one way or the other. You cannot may someone want to budget and save money-especially when they do not contribute to the household.

    Oscar <cashjay31@yahoo.com> wrote: Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to live
    by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a
    family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a
    raining day.
    This person has been freeloading and etc... but, try to run everyone
    financial life. He/She has not work for 15 years and stress those who
    do work on buying things or pay bills that we feel that are not that
    urgent or worry about.
    We want to toss this person out along with their kid, we agree it will
    benefit us but, that would not sit right with our family as a whole.
    How can we silence this freeloading worrier about bills and convince
    them about the benefits of a frugal living ,budgeting,and saving money?

    We are at our end with the price of gas and things this individual
    will actively seek
    work but, they still will not help.

    Well, Thank You for your time,help,and gratitude.

    Best Regards,
    Oscar




    &#32;



  3. #3
    Roxanne
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    Tough Love. It is the only way to teach someone lazy to get off their

    butt and accept responsibility. If removing them from your household is

    what it takes, then so be it. I am of the opinion that someone who is

    capable of doing most anything, should not be coddled. They should be

    pulling their own weight. To bring a child up under these circumstances

    is not setting a good example for the child. Whomever this person is

    needs to get off their hiny, get a job, contribute to all financial

    responsibilities of the household, as well as their fair share of

    household chores (laundry, home improvements, yard work, cooking,

    cleaning, etc.). Household chores are not just for adults, so assign the

    child some chores as well. If they cannot accept the new home rules,

    time for them to find a new home. Tough love. And if the family as a

    whole doesn't like the idea, perhaps that family would like them to move

    in with THEM??? I'm assuming that the family as a "whole" doesn't live

    under the same roof. Maybe those who are offering their negative

    opinion on relocating the freeloaders should offer the freeloaders a

    place to live instead.



    There is no easy solution - it will be difficult, but something has to

    be done for your own sanity and household survival as well as the

    education of the one who is unwilling to help themselves, or anyone else.



    Just my humble opinion

    Roxanne





    Oscar wrote:

    > Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to live

    > by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a

    > family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a

    > raining day.






  4. #4
    Lucy Anderson
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    Just do it!!!!



    I think it goes along the lines of "We have rented a storage unit for your

    stuff and paid the rent for 90 days. You will find your stuff there. When

    you have found a place for your things, you can get them, or you can

    continue to pay the rent at the storage unit (if they decide to freeload

    somewhere else)."



    You'd be amazed at what people are capable of when the need arises. I find

    they usually arise to YOUR expectations. If you expect that this person is

    very capable of being a useful citizen and self-sufficient, and communicate

    this you may very well find that they are.... Maybe it's a self-confidence

    thing? If you keep treating them like a freeloader, they will remain such.







    --Lucy






  5. #5
    Elizabeth Farnsworth
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save




    <TD id="INCREDITEXTREGION" dir="ltr" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt;DIRECTION: ltr;" vAlign="top" width="100%">
    Is this person disabled or impaired in some way and that's why they can't/won't/don't work?
    If it's an adult child give him/her a few months with a deadline to get a job and find their own place.
    You cannot do anything to silence them except be blunt and tell them you don't pay the bills so keep it to yourself! and that you don't want to hear it anymore.

    Again the only way to get them out is to give them a few months to find ajob, welfare and a place to live....They could look into low income housing.
    WE had to give our adult kids a date to move out by and so far so good they found a nice low income place that all 3 adult children plus their 5 children can live in.
    I will finally be virtually kid free in a week or so.......except my 14 yr old son naturally but he's a good kid so no biggie.



    -------Original Message-------


    From: Oscar
    Date: 6/22/2008 8:30:24 AM
    To: Budget101_@yahoogroups.com
    Subject: Budget101.com : How to convince someone to budget and save




    Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to live
    by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a
    family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a
    raining day.
    This person has been freeloading and etc... but, try to run everyone
    financial life. He/She has not work for 15 years and stress those who
    do work on buying things or pay bills that we feel that are not that
    urgent or worry about.
    We want to toss this person out along with their kid, we agree it will
    benefit us but, that would not sit right with our family as a whole.
    How can we silence this freeloading worrier about bills and convince
    them about the benefits of a frugal living ,budgeting,and saving money?

    We are at our end with the price of gas and things this individual
    will actively seek work but, they still will not help.

    Well, Thank You for your time,help,and gratitude.

    Best Regards,
    Oscar









    </TD>
    <TD id="INCREDIANIM" vAlign="bottom" align="middle">


  6. #6
    Karen
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    I'm going to swim against the current here. You can't throw a child

    out and I'm going to take your word for it that it wouldn't set well

    with family if you kick them out. So don't.

    BUT - if they are not working and contributing a fair share to the

    household - then they have no say in how you run your household.

    You and your wife need to sit down and decide on a budget, etc. If

    this "visitor" has access to any of your charge cards, bank accounts,

    etc. - remove them!

    While you're working on the new budget - work on a division of

    household work too unless this is already working out.

    Once you have everything down on paper - you hold a "family meeting"

    with everyone including kids present.

    You state that you MUST get a handle on expenses, savings, time,

    etc (your life, basically)

    From this day on, this is your budget (you need not divulge the exact

    budget you can merely say - you have a new budget in place with an

    emphasis on savings) You can say something like the budget will be

    strictly enforced for 3 or 6 months and then you'll take a look at

    how its working but for that amount of time there will be no buying

    extras.

    You can then outline household duties and throw in something fun -

    like the first Saturday will be picnic day or movie day or just a fun

    day.

    If your visitor protests - tell them you're sorry but when they have

    their own house they can make the rules - this is your house/life and

    they'll have to abide your rules while they live there.

    In brief - treat them like a child which is what they are still -

    they are a dependent under your roof - no matter the age - you are

    supporting them, they live in your house - so your rules.

    Maybe, just maybe, they won't like it and will find another place to

    live without your having to ask them to leave. Worth a shot!!

    In the meantime - maybe you'll get a handle on your finances & get

    them where you want them. Good luck. KarenMO








  7. #7
    Bobbi Schorr
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    Hi Oscar,

    May I offer two suggestions:



    1. People only spend your money IF YOU let them, so don't let them

    and

    2. Offer any family member that "it does not sit well" for you to remove the

    "freeloader" from your home the opportunity to take him/her in for a while.



    --- On Sun, 6/22/08, Oscar

    Subject: Budget101.com : How to convince someone to budget and save





    Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to

    live



    by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a



    family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a



    raining day.






  8. #8
    Val Coulman
    Guest

    Default How to convince someone to budget and save

    If there is a valid reason this person cannot find a place of their own

    perhaps another family member could take on the responsibilities for awhile.

    It's easy to have expectations for others when you don't live with the

    situation on a daily basis.



    If they are able to work, then its your job to let them know what the

    boundaries are. Even if they continue to live with you, they need to be

    responsible for their own debts -don't let them have access to your credit

    cards or bank accounts, don't pay their bills and don't let them have any

    input on your budget. You could set a work-in-lieu-of-rent schedule that

    assigns them responsibilities in your home. Let them know what percentage of

    the grocery bill they will be responsible for or give them their own small

    fridge and hot plate to manage their own meals. Don't pay for them to come

    out for dinner with you, pay for their cell phone, buy school supplies or

    cover their long distance bills. Put passwords on your computers so they

    cannot shop online. In short, make it as difficult as possible for them to

    get access to finances or create debt in any name but their own.



    Unfortunately, they will never "be convinced to budget and save" if they are

    still getting freebies at your house. Its up to you to set and enforce the

    boundaries based on your own financial reality and your own preparations for

    your own future. If you're interested, here's the link to an article I wrote

    last year about passing on money management skills.

    http://www.mailtribune.com/apps/pbcs.../JOY/710170304

    The people I interviewed were firm that too many people are not prepared for

    their own future because they're supporting someone else that is well able

    to fend for themselves.



    And good luck. It's a tough situation but an incredibly important one to

    address.



    V.puter



    On Sun, Jun 22, 2008 at 7:54 AM, Oscar <cashjay31@yahoo.com> wrote:



    > Hello, I have a problem as stated in my subject line, I want to live

    > by a budget and save money but, there is a person's in my household, a

    > family member that doesn't believe in putting money aside for a

    > raining day.






 

 
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