Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

Hi There to all! My daughter is getting married this summer and would like a big wedding... however I am a single Mom and don't have the means to have a big wedding.. so... I would like to stay within about 3000 dollars... eeekk I know that with the prices today that isn't much. So... help ideas

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  1. #1
    Peaches14845@aol.com
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!



    Hi There to all!
    My daughter is getting married this summer and would like a big wedding... however I am a single Mom and don't have the means to have a big wedding.. so... I would like to stay within about 3000 dollars... eeekk I know that with the prices today that isn't much. So... help ideas needed!!! Thanks a bunch in advance!

    Debbie


    Who's never won? Biggest Grammy Award surprises of all time on AOL Music.




  2. #2
    lisa griffeth
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

    We are going through this as well at my house- except being the Groom's parents we aren't "obligated" as much as you are by tradition. Both of the kids are paying for the wedding together (his first, her second) but we are helping where we can. To me, the biggest thing you can do is have it at a time when a meal is not expected...like 3pm or something. If you are a church member and they have a reception hall, USE it rather than renting a place. See if a neighbor has a pretty garden you can use...then you don't have to purchase many flowers either to decorate with. My future DIL found a dress she loved at David's Bridal- for $400! I was horrified...we looked at Nordestroms and other places and have found one she's happy with for $178- still more than I would have hoped to pay. For favors we are using Hershey's nuggets w/wrappers that have their names and wedding date- on eBay,
    1.50 per 30...now if I can just catch a candy sale before September...LOL They are having only her children in the wedding and thedaughter has a gooddress already. We will hit after Easter sales to get the son a suit. It can be very pretty and personal and not cost a bloody fortune. Check w/grocery stores for the wedding cake (my second wedding cake came from Bi-lo and it was good and cheap), if you have friends/family that bake let one of them make the grooms cake instead of giving the couple a gift. You can tie your own bows for pews for a fraction of the cost-if not, check w/a Michaels crafts on cost. Ivy bowls and colored rocks can be bought at Dollar tree for centerpieces on tables- add a votive candle @6/1.00. Mostly, you have to ask for and be willing to take help that is offered- and think outside the box...use hanging
    baskets on stands for color and then take them home after the service- ferns look good and are pretty cheap at home stores. One thing that has helped us is to keep the bride's hands off of those big thick glossy "Wedding Guides" and magazines- for us, a 3,000 dress is NOT an option....to think that spending a down payment on a house for a wedding is "normal" is not what you want on her mind right now! Enjoy and I hope this helps a little- Lisa G.

    Peaches14845@aol.com wrote: Hi There to all! My daughter is getting married this summer and would like a big wedding... however I am a single Mom and don't have the means to have a big wedding..
    <FONT style="FONT: 10pt ARIAL, SAN-SERIF;COLOR: black;"> Who's never won? Biggest Grammy Award surprises of all time on AOL Music.


    &#32;



  3. #3
    herberkids3
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

    First and foremost, set her down, and give her a hard budget. Tell

    her you will contribute $3,000 to the wedding.



    When my brother got married last fall, they had a big meeting with

    all the parents, and some grandparents who were willing to help with

    the budget as well.



    The parents and the couple got a chance to see a realistic amount of

    money, and everyone knew ahead of time who would be helping with

    what.



    So, get together with the future husband, and his parents, and

    everyone hash out who can contribute what.



    Long gone are the days where the parents of the bride are expect to

    pay for the entire wedding.



    You'll probably be able to get some ideas on who will be able to

    help out where.



    Also, use contacts and family to find ways to cut the costs. Do

    either families have photographers in the family? If so, ask if they

    are willing to take the pictures in lieu of a gift, and provide the

    negatives to the couple so they can print up what they want.



    Does anyone know how to decorate cakes? Maybe you can get someone to

    donate the cake as a gift.



    For our wedding, a family friend donated the cake- it was a 4 tier

    standard wedding cake. My FIL and my aunt are both photographers, so

    they took all of the pictures.



    Family helped out with the food, so we didn't have to get a caterer.

    I went to a floral design school for 2 years, so I did all my own

    flowers with artificial flowers. I was able to get them wholesale

    through my step-mother's business (she ran a paint/sign shop, but

    held a wholesale license that was useable when we went into a flower

    warehouse).



    Check with family members who might belong to clubs- the Moose,

    Eagles, VFW, etc- because most of the time, those clubs have some

    sort of a room available for banquets, which members can rent

    cheaper. We got our local American Legion hall for only $50. Now,

    granted, that was almost 10 years ago, but my brother had his

    reception there as well this past fall, and paid out $75 for the

    hall, was all. We just had to clean it up that night, because in the

    morning, they had a regular pancake breakfast.



    For the dress, have her shop around a LOT, and rummage clearance &

    discontinued racks. These days, she could likely find a dress that

    would blow the budget completely just there.



    In the end, you just really need to stress to her that she can have

    a good wedding, but that she has got to stay within her budget.



    At a family meeting, layout who is providing what in a budget plan.

    List who will take care of what charges- who wants to deal with the

    hall, the food, the dress, the flowers, the decoration, etc.



    Lay out specifically the money, though. If the groom's family can

    contribute $1500, add that to the budget. If the bride & groom

    themselves can contribute to getting the dress themselves, then add

    that.



    The bottom line is- you can't shoulder it by yourself, so ask for

    help.



    --- In Budget101_@yahoogroups.com, Peaches14845@... wrote:

    >

    > Hi There to all!

    > My daughter is getting married this summer and would like a

    big

    > wedding... however I am a single Mom and don't have the means to

    have a big wedding..

    > so... I would like to stay within about 3000 dollars... eeekk I

    know that

    > with the prices today that isn't much. So... help ideas needed!!!

    Thanks a bunch

    > in advance!

    >

    > Debbie

    >

    >

    >

    > **************Biggest Grammy Award surprises of all time on AOL

    Music.

    > (http://music.aol.com/grammys/picture...-won-a-grammy?

    NCID=aolcmp003000000025

    > 48)

    >










  4. #4
    Herlean
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

    My advice: Start early Make as much of it yourself as you can Prioritize. We got married years ago and had 250-300 guests and did not spend near that (not including our wedding rings & honeymoon). We sat down and figured out what we really wanted and devoted the largest part of our budget to that. We got a professional photographer. We still hunted for bargains, but we got great pictures! (at a bargain) Get married on a day other than Saturday (MOST EXPENSIVE DAY). Try a Friday night or Sunday afternoon. A holiday is great too. People are already off work and some churches are already decorated, depending on the date. (Think Easter, Mother's Day). Make your own invitations, maps, Thank You cards, etc. Use disposable cameras (just a regular Fuji - green ones - great film); not the "wedding white" ones - way overpriced. Let the guests take some pictures. Do you know anyone who can help with __________________? Ask! Let a friend bake a cake or favors. That can be their gift to you. Borrow things. Start shopping now for shoes. A simple pair of white leather shoes can be worn for the wedding and dyed later for wearing to other occasions, incl. work. Rent your wedding dress. Ask for one on Freecycle. Go to a place like David's Bridal - try on a variety of styles. Then, go buy your dress elsewhere. D.B. is quite pricey from my experience. I got my own dress from JCPenney. It is breathtaking (to use my husband's words). Get married "off
    season" - not during proms or summertime. Buy your napkins online. Get only enough for each guest. Use plain ones (at the grocery store - in white) for serving and meals. Limit the food selections - one meat, one pasta, one veggie dish. Make what you can. Or find a place that will give you a good deal. Don't serve T-bones to everyone. You can find something between T-Bone and ground chuck and still serve a nice, elegant meal for the wedding. Don't serve dinner. Have the reception around lunch (serve brunch - type foods); or even just serve assorted desserts. (Wedding cake, cupcakes, mini cheesecakes, fancy decorated cookies, etc.) Buy regular pantyhose. I got several pair and never did wear any. That dress was HOT!!!!!! Nobody will remember if she wears white hose with embroidery or
    not. Make her purse. My Mom made a beautiful one for me with a pearl handle and satin fabric. I still have it and use it for special outings. Make her veil. Easy to do if you can sew or know someone who does. The materials are really inexpensive. Make the floral bouquets. We got DIY videos at the library and did all of the flowers and boutennieres. Gorgeous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HTH, Herlean

    Peaches14845@aol.com wrote: Hi There to all! My daughter is getting married this summer and would like a big wedding... however I am a single
    Mom and don't have the means to have a big wedding.. so... I would like to stay within about 3000 dollars... eeekk I know that with the prices today that isn't much. So... help ideas needed!!! Thanks a bunch in advance! Debbie


    <FONT style="FONT: 10pt ARIAL, SAN-SERIF;COLOR: black;"> Who's never won? Biggest Grammy Award surprises of all time on AOL Music.


    <SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: comic sans ms;"> rgb(96,0,191);FONT-FAMILY: system;">"Opportunity may knock once on your door. Temptation leans against the doorbell." -
    Unknown
    "Never believe you don't have what it takes."



    &#32;
    Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. [/url] "] Try it now.[/url]


  5. #5
    Kari Carlisle
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

    My husband and I did several things to keep our wedding to a budget. First, my crafty mom put together simple, but incredibly elegant, bouquets of red roses from Costco. Second, we're real outdoorsy, so it was an appropriate favor to make bags of trail mix, again from Costco. Third, our rehearsal dinner was an informal party at the church, catered by Subway. It really took the edge off the stress. Fourth, and I'm not recommending this, we made our own wedding cake. We spent a lot of time picking out flavors (three different ones!). We bought a Wilton cake decorating book (neither of us had ever decorated a cake before). We bought the supplies at a cake/candy supply store. I baked the cakes from mixes two weeks before the wedding and froze them. The day before the wedding, I made the frosting and my husband did the decorating. Berries and fake
    vines polished it off, and the cakes were displayed on a tiered rack we rented. Friends were responsible for the delivery and set up at the reception. The folks at the hotel where we had the reception, and everyone who attended thought it was professional! It was the hit of the party, and many said it was the best wedding cake they ever had.But it was also the most stressful part of the wedding for us. Oh, except for making our own wedding invitations. Fifth, the wedding invitations - we picked out pretty papers at an art store and did our own printing. Buy extra materials and supplies to cover any mistakes. Make sure you have back up ink/toner for your printer, and get this done early. Bride crying at 2:00 a.m. not good. Nowadays you should be able to find help from a scrapbooker. Sixth, we booked our honeymoon through Costco. Smokin deal on an all-inclusive resort in Cancun. Kari Happily married for 8 years


  6. #6
    Peggy
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!





    I am also a single mom.



    I hear all the time that weddings take a year or more to plan and

    that they cost $20,000 and up. My daughter had a small wedding (only

    about 40 guests) and it cost us less than $1,000. We put it together

    in about a month.



    First of all, we did everything we could ourselves. She picked out

    some beautiful note cards and asked me to hand write the invitations

    which I did. We made her veil, unity candle, all table decorations,

    and bows for the church pews. (My daughter and I had taken a bow-

    making class several years before at a craft store. It is amazing

    how easy it is to make fancy bows at a fraction of what you pay for

    them from a florist, etc.)



    Her dress was not a "regular" fussy bridal gown, but a beautiful

    white suit with a long skirt and gold trim on the jacket. Very

    elegant and classy looking. She said when she saw it that it struck

    her as something Princess Diana would have worn. She got it off a

    mark-down rack at Catherines, for only $60.oo.



    Flowers: Instead of a bouquet, my daughter carried a single lavendar

    rose with ferns, baby's breath and lots of ribbon streamers. It was

    so pretty. Her bridesmaids each carried a single pink sweetheart

    rose, gussied up with ribbon and ferns. The basket the flower girl

    carried was an old one I had in my basement. We spray-painted it

    white (with paint I already had on hand) and added bows to match the

    bride's and attendants' flowers. The florist charged us only a couple

    of dollars for enough rose petals to fill the little basket.



    She told the bridesmaids and her little flower girl she was not going

    to ask them to spend a lot of money on something they would never

    wear again, and in fact, she said they did not have to even buy

    anything new. She said her colors were pink and lavendar and asked

    them to wear anything they liked in those colors. . . . .Needless to

    say, her bridesmaids' dresses didn't match, but they all looked great.



    Her cousin's husband is a prefessional photographer, and he took all

    the pictures and gave us the film - we had it developed and made

    whatever pictures we wanted from the negatives.



    The reception was held in the church hall. We had a buffet dinner

    and I made almost all the food mysaelf. I ordered chicken and had it

    delivered. But I made everything else, and we also had ham,

    sausages with peppers and onions, green beans almondine, garlic

    potatoes, parmesan noodles, tossed salad, vegetable trays and cheese

    trays. (I used to work in a deli, so I knew how to make professional

    trays.)



    The cake came from a grocery store bakery -- it was gorgeous.



    One of my friends offered to supply us with trays of home-made

    cookies as well for the cake table, and we were delighted to take her

    up on the offer! ......



    At each place setting there was a white chocolate rose on a silk

    flower stem with green leaves. It had a cellophane wrapper around

    the candy part and was tied with pink and lavendar ribbon

    streamers. My daughter got all the supplies at a cake and candy

    supply store, and made them all herself. Very pretty and very

    inexpensive to make.



    When I went back to work the next week after the wedding a man I

    worked with whose daughter was married the same day as my daughter

    had the nerve to ask me how much I had spent on the wedding. When I

    told him less than $1,000, he scoffed and said it couldn't have been

    much of a wedding for that -- he said he had paid out a little over

    $25,000 for his daughter's wedding. Well, my daughter had a

    beautiful wedding and we had a wonderful time. It was very sweet

    wedding and we got tons of compliments about it. In fact, people are

    still saying how nice it was!





    .......and, at the end of the day, my daughter was just as much

    married as the girl with the $25,000 wedding. And we actually had a

    lot of fun putting it all together!



    This is just my personal opinion, but for whatever it's worth, I

    think poeple today have lost the meaning of what the wedding is.

    They have turned it into a big show and a big way to get gifts. I

    could gag every time I hear people say something about it being "the

    bride's day". A wedding should be a solemn occasion - a beginning of

    a couple's life together. (Yeah, I know most of them have been

    living together already and many of them have babies, and yet they

    have a big church wedding. That doesn't seem to offend anyone any

    more. Why is that?) And the reception is a party to celebrate with

    the newly weds.



    Oh, by the way, I didn't mention earlier in this post that by having

    the reception in hte church fellowship, there was no alcohol served.

    As I said before, they were just as married as the couple at the

    wedding wiht the open bar. The difference was that I did not have

    the expense of paying for the alcohol and paying a bartender. My

    daughter did not want alcohol there. She had been to weddings (we

    all have!) where someone got drunk, some where fighting broke out.

    So she did not want to take the chance of anyone spoiling a lovely

    evening.



    I hope your daughter will have a beautiful and meaningful wedding. I

    hope it is not the happiest day of her life, but the beginning of a

    lifetime of happiness!!!!



    Best wishes!


















  7. #7
    Helene Wagoner
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

    Great Ideas Lisa. My wedding too was done ourselves. It was beautiful and our

    only cost was clothing, dresses for bride, bridesmaid and flower girl on sale

    and the ones we asked to be groomsmen and ushers we asked if they would be

    willing to pay 1/2 the rental cost and with a special deal with the rental place

    you can get if you go in early enough we got the groom's and ring bearer's

    rental free. And food was done buffet style with alot of use doing the platters

    such as finger sandwiches, hor ders, punch and a fancy sparkling cider for

    toasting. Another idea that we used is we approached other family members and

    close friends and asked that instead of gifts we told them where we had our

    wedding cake and flowers on order and if they could just contribute a payment

    of even 5.00 here and there would help. By time the wedding came around both had

    been completely paid for as gifts.



    And the craft store is a great idea. We made all our own guest gifts, table

    center pieces (candles and silk flowers),party favors, ect. Also go to some

    place such as Party City for wedding accessories such as guest book, ring

    pillow, fancy serving platters, plates and all ect. really cheap.



    We all had the greatest time !!! I love the memories !!!



    Good Luck !!!!!





    ----- Original Message ----

    From: lisa griffeth

    Subject: Re: Budget101.com : Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!



    We are going through this as well at my house- except being the Groom's parents

    we aren't "obligated" as much as you are by tradition.






  8. #8
    Kathy Anderson
    Guest

    Default Good Morning! Wedding Plans needed!

    Helene,

    just finished reading your post regarding Wedding Plans Needed, and the

    part about asking the guests/friends/family to help pay for the cake and flowers

    with a small donation is absolutely marvelous !!!! That would be so perfect for

    a Second Marriage, or a couple who have been living together for awhile and

    really don't need the toaster. blender, bath towels. etc/ They already have most

    everything they need to start a household....but donating towards the

    cake/flowers is a perfect way for them to still "give a gift" to the happy

    couple/

    Great idea !!!



    Kathy





    Helene Wagoner <Historylover1500@yahoo.com> wrote:

    Great Ideas Lisa. My wedding too was done ourselves. It was beautiful

    and our only cost was clothing, dresses for bride, bridesmaid and flower girl on

    sale






 

 
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