----- Original Message -----
From: KYHL1128@aol.com
To: Budget101_@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Friday, April 25, 2003 5:38 AM
Subject: Re: Budget101.com : SHE system


Kathy, Are you going to share your system? I have the book, and used to
belong to FlyLady, but the index card thing is just too much for me. I did
get a lot more done when I was on FlyLady. I do need to get organized in
keeping my home clean!

Another Kathy


Each card has listed extremely simple things, right down to brushing teeth in
order of highest priority. I number the cards by 200's so I can put one, or
several new cards in between the old cards.

A card generally looks like this (I've supplied a few cards and separated them
with asterisks for you):

**********

Kathy 000200

06:00 a.m.

Wake up. Depakote, water, food. Reset alarm for 07:00 a.m.

**********

Kathy 000400
Bathroom

Go pee. Check out condition of bathroom and pick up
garbage from floor.

**********

Kathy 000600

Bathroom

Brush teeth, glyoxide if necessary.

**********

Kathy 000800

Living Room

Either snooze for an hour or begin working.

**********

Kathy 001000

Living Room

07:00 a.m.

Synthroid, water.

**********

And so on.

We have between 150 and 200 cards. It may sound daunting, but it is
unbelievably easy to get through.

For the most part the cards are organized room by room, and outside.
Seasonal things are also included, but I put them near the end.

I could put more than one item on a card, but I know myself very well, and I
would miss something if I didn't put each specific activity on separate cards.

Being that specific also might sound picky, but there are days in the past
when we headed out to do grocery shopping and I suddenly realized my kids didn't
brush their teeth, eat breakfast, or even go to the bathroom. I was completely
mortified the day our postal clerk noticed my three year old son was in his
underwear and a colored t-shirt (fortunately it was hot summertime). Our next
stop was the toddler department in WalMart. One good case of having to spend
more than necessary. That doesn't happen any more.

I have cards that stand up perpendicularly to the chore card, with each of our
names on a separate card, so the child can move the marker forward to the next
thing they will do. As I'm working I check the cards and move each completed
card to the back of the cards so they are still in numerical order. That way
my kids can't get anything really out of order without my noticing. They also
can't just throw away a card - I'll notice! Each day we start over again.

Work can be interchangeable. Sometimes my daughter decides to start with the
living room, so I take the kitchen. My son can definitely handle the bathroom
(except for the toilet bowl cleaner), so he usually does that. Kathy, Halea,
Danny is on any card that all of us can handle. If one person doesn't do it,
somebody has to.

We just skip over cards if the chore or activity doesn't need to be done that
day. I refuse to wipe down the molding in the doorways every single day!
Most of the time it takes us an hour and one-half in the morning to get through
the cards. Considering I used to get nothing done, this is a substantial
improvement!

Deciding whether or not to declutter a drawer just takes a split second; and
most of the time it doesn't get cluttered in the first place because only one
thing needs to be removed, given away or placed somewhere else.

If I decide to do something a little out of order (like waiting until mid
morning to take a shower), I just leave that card at the front until I've done
it, and then I file it in numerical order when I'm done. Sometimes I decide to
let my kids sleep until 7:30 or 8:00 so I can get time to myself in the morning.

I didn't number the cards at first because I knew revamping the entire file
would be an immense task. I've been doing it for long enough now that I don't
mind numbering them.

Also, I do them on 5 x 8 cards so I can type them and put them through the
computer printer. I write way too slow, and type like a speed demon. I'm
sure someone could do them on 3 x 5 cards if they wanted to handwrite every
card. If recording activities is taken in baby steps, the task is easy as pie.
I didn't expect to have it done in a week - I gave myself forever.

It's an absolute lifesaver. I don't always feel well (fibromyalgia,
hypothyroid, hypoglycemia and photosensitive epilepsy), and sometimes don't
concentrate well, so it's an easy way to stay focused. I'm reasonably smart,
and my mind jumps from one thing to another in a split second - and consequently
the old thought vaporizes. In addition, my train of thought is perpetually
interrupted by children and pets; and both figured out the derailment is
definitely to their advantage. My children hate the card file for that reason.
) They make up names and stories for it. I'm flattered!

If I notice my children are not doing a chore correctly, I put specific

instructions on the card. My daughter was in the habit of putting white
clothes in with her dark clothes, so I added the correct information to the
card. I have to admit, though, she continued to do it her way, and put only a
couple of pieces in at a time, so I have temporarily banned her from doing
laundry. She's frustrated because she has to wait for me to do her laundry;
and she had to help in the nursery in her good clothes last Sunday. The other
helpers teased her when she told them why she wasn't wearing blue jeans, and why
she was a few minutes late. They all know me well enough to get a big chuckle
out of the situation.

If something has happened to interrupt our routine for a few days and we get
behind, we can pick up the card routine again and know that our efforts will be
focused, organized and quick. No overwhelming feeling. No replanning a
routine in my head because it's all there in black and white for us.

In addition, I've noticed that each day that passes brings less work in the
routine. We get the most important things done first.

I do the same thing with our budgeting and shopping, but in alphabetical
order. Daily expenses get recorded in our computerized check register labeled
"Budget"; the monthly budget totals, shopping lists, and inventory go in the
card file.

It's actually very close to the FlyLady and SHE systems, but I think it is
easier to follow. I can't retain a routine in my head. I'm reasonably smart,
but I can be way too discombobulated if there is too much going on. My mind
moves way too fast from one thing to the next. My kids, husband and pets
interrupt my train of thought constantly, and I know they have figured out my
derailment works for them; one of the reasons they don't like the card file.
) They make up names and stories for it. I'm flattered!

The SHE system is a pretty good idea, but dividing the work into days of the
week makes me think it gets a little fractured, and a little difficult to track.
I'm not a person who can say I will do something specific on Sunday, especially
if something else happened and I missed that chore on Sunday, I would feel
discouraged. I tried the system for a while and became discouraged because I
started mixing up the cards and putting them back in the wrong places. Keeping
all the chores in one space and numbered seems a lot easier to me.

Hope this helps. It will work for some and other methods will work for
others.

Kathy Dickinson
Halea's Doll Clothes
http://www.haleasdollclothes.com
ebay User ID: haleasdollclothes
Yahoo User ID: haleasdollclothes

A day hemmed in prayer is less likely to unravel - unless you have cats!


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