by, 12-08-2012 at 12:05 PM (1271 Views)
I'm finally home!
The work pace was grueling but worth it. I know I can do a little better on time by manageing things better. For instance, I lost my list from last year and ended up driving around looking for some of my customers. I'm sure I missed some. Other's,I've been working for now for years, and wish I had time to just sit and chat. As busy as I was though, I had time to reflect. Not idle time. But the kind of time you have when you are working alone and your thoughts leave the task at hand. I was in that place a lot. My outward self painting candy canes and snowmen, but my inward self was setting some things right.
Some of you may have heard me complain about burn out. I've been saying for the past few years that I just didn't want to do this anymore. I'd hustled to hard for to long. I really thought that was the case. But it wasn't . I lost my Dady a few years ago now, and my Mama a year later. I lost the bio father( didn't know him for very long or very well) in between the two of them. Ummm. For the bio, it was a strange sense of loss. To much to share. But as for Mama and Daddy, it was two tremendous blows for me.
I havn't been burnt out.
I've been grieving my Mama and Daddy.